Player as Muse

My player had a wonderful time over spring break reading and writing about her favorite topic and being a muse. Her alter ego, Mary, has a chapter to write and is on a deadline, but the player made it fun by reminding her how much she LOVES what she is studying and translating into words for others.

She started by doing a lot of reading from books and journal articles -- total Geek Fest! She knows a lot about this topic, but she still couldn't get enough and loved seeing how others wrote about it and talked about it and thought about it in so many different ways. Oh, the possibilities!

But then, she had to get serious about writing something. What direction should she take? Her editor gave her so much freedom. All that 'agency' and 'autonomy' which is soooo wonderful, but.... then she started questioning herself about whether or not she ultimately, would be giving the editor what she really wanted. She started questioning herself and wondering whether this was all that much fun afterall. So, she went to a couple of movies. She saw Oz, then the silly one, the Magnificent Burt Wonderstone. She went out for lunch with a girlfriend; out to dinner with her husband. Total Avoidance.

But somewhere along the way, after lots of thinking, and lots of avoidance, and a little bit of reading of a mystery novel instead of sitting down to the computer, Mary realized the player had all along been gathering ideas. She'd collected LOTS of great ideas in her magic satchel. They'd been sorting and organizing and forming into full blown sentences and paragraphs right before her eyes. They started writing together, side-by-side, and the 'flow' started flowing, more words started coming, connecting the bits and pieces of ideas together, and all was good.

Avoidance Play or Deep Thinking?

This week I couldn't wait to get to work on my alternate ego, my 'empowered, fully-embodied' player, The Intrepid Pilgrim, as I call her, taking her off the page on which I had drawn her and colored her and making her come to life, so to speak.  I have soooo many other pressing concerns, especially some writing projects that are looming large and causing me some mental stress, but as I opened my backpack the evening after our play seminar, instead of taking out my books and notes related to those projects, and even before taking out my laptop (imagine!), I grabbed my bits and scaps of cloth, yarn and tagboard, got out some scissors, tape, and a couple of colored markers. What was I thinking?! Clearly, I was avoiding my writing, right?

 Well, I guess, yes, and no. As I worked on my player, I thought more about her, the characteristics I had given her in the resume that I wrote for her. She's all about trekking along and collecting her thoughts, taking her time to gather them all together, putting them in her satchel safe and sound so that she can go off  to a place where she can pull them out, and put them together in a meaningful way. And that's exactly what I found myself doing -- collecting my thoughts in a very content and relaxed way! As I look back on it now, some of the things I was thinking about during my work 'played' out in the writing I did this weekend. My mind, while relaxed and engaged in 'thinking about collecting my thoughts' as the embodied player at one level, was actually clicking along helping me organize some of my ideas for how to approach my work, how to sort out the ideas I was putting randomly, piece by piece into my satchel. Because I wasn't 'thinking about my thinking' at the time, the flow wasn't disturbed by this metacognition.

So, was I playing, I'd say, "yes." Was I working, "not sure." This is something we were all 'supposed to do' so that's work, right? It was productive and fun for me and it paid off in the end with a clearer head, less stress, and better organization as I began my writing. Do I understand play better, "again, I'm not sure!"